Something to Shout About!!!

Hip Hip Hooray!

Be sure to check back all this week,

for a HUGE giveaway!

Flashback Friday

So I'd like for you to take a look at THIS little yummy guy of mine.

And then take a look at THESE pictures of my little Jake when he was the same age.

Could they be more twinish?

I just think it's neat how I got TWO long and skinny fuzzy heads.

And then I got TWO round and chubby baldies.

OH.

And don't forget my chocolate DEEEE-light :)

These Boots Are Made for Jessica

Wow, two posts in one day? I'm on a role, it's time to go solo, ROLLIN...

Lately I've been in the mood to buy some really cute tall boots for the winter.

Ya know, since it gets all wintery here and all...Pfff.

Whatever.

No but for real, I HAVE been wanting some ultra radical boots so I went on a hunt online today to find the perfect pair.

I searched HI and LOWE and FINALLY found the ones I had envisioned in my head right HERE.

But wouldn't you know, they don't have my size.

Just my luck.

Aren't they cute though? Ohhh I'm in heaven.

So since I knew I wasn't getting those boots, I continued on with my search and I came across THESE lovelies shown below.

At first I was in love but the more I kept looking at them the more I started to think they looked a little elfish or maybe WWI-ish or whatever that war was called where they dressed colonial. I started thinking about powder wigs and heard Little Drummer Boy playing in my mind.

Yikes, I don't wanna look like that!

So nix those (I'm sure that's not the right 'nix' or the right way to spell 'nix' so go ahead Bonnie, Kathy or Valinda...correct me!)

I found these beauties HERE and started my love affair once again.

But the more I started staring at THESE, the more I started thinking they looked too rain booty or galoshey.

I dunno, whadya think? I think they're super adorable! Would I look dumb prancing around in these? And YES, I WOULD be prancing because that's just how odd I am.

Speaking of prancing around, Brandi I didn't see you this week!! Where were you?! I was getting excited about running into you. Have you gone home already? :(

Ok back to the rain boots.

Yes or No?

And don't answer if you have no sense of unique style or taste.

I don't care to hear your opinion, thanks :)

SOOooOO.

That brings us to Boot #4.

I found these and think they're pretty chic! I'd sure feel hot walking around in these babies with my skinny jeans on paired with a nice bag like the one my Kempy got me for my birthday and my headband from Stephy.

But then again I dunno. Am I that fancy? Should I stick with the galoshes and be more casual?

What are your thoughts?

You can see a bigger picture of them with different views HERE.

Go check em out.

What's on Jessica's phone?!?

Here it is. My usual phone unload.

Let us take a journey through the happenings on my phone.

1. A precious little sexy that I like to call My Snoopy.

Isn't that little raised arm just divine? Don't you wanna bite him or at least rub your face on him?

2. Random lady at the school drop off wearing a shirt that reads,

"Beavers Love Wood".

Dear Random Lady at the school drop off,

As much as my blog gets around you're sure to eventually see this post of you. I'm writing to ask you WHAT exactly does your shirt mean when it says, "Beavers Love Wood." It can't POSSIBLY mean what I THINK it means, can it?

No.

No you wouldn't wear that, would you?

You're braver than me and because of that, I'll high five you if you ever see this and confront me about it.

3. The homemade tampon.

So Michele and I went to the New Moon midnight showing together and to help us keep our old motherly eyeballs peeled open, we stopped at the C-Store for energy drinks.

Being the geniuses we are, we opened our drinks BEFORE going into the movie so we had to hide them in our bags...opened.

Well come to find out, Michele isn't as blonde as she looks.

She made this homemade tampon to stick in the top of her drink so it wouldn't splash around in her bag.

4. The mutha in booger green sweats changing a diaper.

Kora caught this candid shot of me RIGHT before I told her, "Please don't take a picture of me looking like this." Thank you Kora, for being the rebel you are.

5. My little Dallas Cowboy.
So uhmm, remember when the Indian team played the Cowboys?
Yea, the Cowboys won.
Just thought Jason should know that.


6. Sweet Ethan holding a sweet Gus.
After dinner at Gia's, the kids entertained themselves by passing around the baby.
Kinda like taking shots but less alcoholic.


7. Miss Ava taking her shot of Gus.

8. I'll let you take a guess as to what this is.
I'll give you a hint. What does it LOOK like?

9. Okay Okay I couldn't hold it in any longer.
Fried bananas...what did you THINK it was? Pff...
Made especially for the Lowe's by this guy, MA.


Eww. I ended on #9.

Taebo Wednesdays

So I've decided to dedicate the first Wednesday of each month to be...

"TAEBO WEDNESDAYS!!!"

I know I know, it's really original, huh?

BUT

I'm doing it for three reasons:

1. I can't go running on Wednesdays because Miah doesn't have Pre-K so I'm forced to do an indoor workout and Taebo it is.

2. I want some sort of accountability with my weight loss program and I've chosen to blast myself publicly to my blog viewers so you can hate on me if I slack.

AND

3.???

Hmm

Okay so I only have 2 reasons but I guess it just sounded better to say I had three.

So each first Wednesday of the month I'll be posting my stats.

Isn't Billy Blanks intimidating?

He makes me nervous when he talks to the camera like he's talking to me and he knows when I'm cheating.

My goal is to lose at LEAST 2 lbs a week which I think is healthy enough right?

This should put me at my goal weight right around April 1st.

My goal weight is...

130 lbs

This is my most favorite weight, the weight I was happiest at.

This is the weight I was POST Kora pregnancy when I was most athletic. See how skinny my face and arms are?

Awwww, to be a light weight again...

oooh AND that tan.

I plan to obtain my goal weight by running, walking, taebo, eating healthy, and cutting out...

ALL COKES!!!

WoW

That's a biggie for me but I've already gone 3 days without one and gotten past the headache stage so I think I can tough it out.

OH

and Perrier doesn't count cuz everyone needs a little bubbly in their throat now and then, right?

OKAY

Are you ready for this?

Don't laugh. Well, you CAN laugh but don't let ME know that you're laughing.

HEIGHT

(which won't change but I'm giving you perspective):

5'10"

WEIGHT: 165 lbs *shutter*

Now I'm not gonna list all those left thigh right bicep crap measurements cuz y'all don't care about that. You just wanna know the weight, right?

So there it is.

AND

I'm debating.

I'm debating whether or not I should go full all out Biggest Loser style and take a picture of me with sports bra and running pants.

Do I dare show you?

I ain't got no shame.

SOOOOO...

If you're cool, you'll start Taebo Wednesdays on YOUR blog too.

I dare you.

You know you're a bad blogger when...

...your Father in Law has to call you to tell you to update.

Sorry Pops.

So it's December 1st. How did that happen?

My Lover is out of town for a week and this is the first time I've ever been left alone for several days in a row with all five rats.

Maybe that's why my candy countdown looks like this when it SHOULD only have ONE candy missing from the top.

Sorry mutha. I'll refill it.

(prolly more than once)

So here's what you've missed.

I had a girl day with Amber and we stormed Target being rowdy heathens with our babies and our big girls.

And little girls.

No just kidding.

That's August that we dressed up with a bow just to see what it would feel like to have a new baby girl.

HEY, a mom can dream right?

I'm sure he'll love this picture when he's 16.

The two REAL girls acted wild and crazy running up and down isles and scanning every item they could find with the self scanner.

I think I'm gonna get one of those installed in my house.

I went to the craft fair here on base and found the loveliest little item. It's called a Sasha ABC. I bought it because it's UH-MAZE-ING.
You all know I've tried every single wrap, sling, bjorn, and baby carrier known to man with my FIVE kids and I can 100% honestly say that THIS is THE BEST YET.
It has all the function and comfort of a Moby or Sleepy Baby wrap, the ease of a Bjorn or carrier and cuteness and style of a sling.
I'm in love.

And so is Gus.
The lady who makes them lives here on base and she's a super cute dreamy little bundle of sweetness!! Her name is Corinna and her business is called Sasha's Inspirations.
I love her so much I'm thinking of asking her to donate a Sasha ABC to the blog for a give away. I'll keep you posted on that.
You can visit her website HERE and order a Sasha ABC just like mine!
Trust me, you will LOVE IT.


For Thanksgiving we had Austin's mom in town and we also invited our new friends Michele and her two sons Aidan and Cole over. Michele's husband is deployed so we didn't want her to spend the holiday alone.

Just in case you're wondering WHY I decided to have so many kids...
It's so they can do the cleaning before parties.

Miah does the tables.


Kora vacuums.

And Jake sweeps.

All while me and the Lover do a little of this stuff.

Boy won't it be nice when the two littlest guys get bigger?!

So the food was super yummy and the company was even better!

The boys had so much fun.

They played Marines until late late late.

That never gets old.

On Saturday we had Kora's 7th birthday party at the base theater.

We watched a movie that pretty much sucked biz-alls.

Shorts.

I don't recommend it.

And we ate popcorn, hot dogs and nachos!!

After the movie we did cupcakes and presents!

Ooooh, my favorite!

We had a blast!

The boys thought they were so cool.

Penner guy thought he was so grownup with his frosting free cupcake.

And the mothers thought they were so skinny.

Oh wait.

They are.

Why do I keep choosing friends who are like SERIOUSLY skinny?

It's really bad for my health.

That's Michele and Amber.

And Summer and Karma with some of the big girls.

And My Lover and his Mom and August's head flailing backwards.

And the cutie patootie rock stars.

Isabel, Ava, Kora and Abby.

And then of course, Kora and her...

Uhmm..

Friend that's a boy named Cole

The one she talked about in THIS post.

Until next time my dears!

Not the same warm fuzzies

A day after I found Jake's letter to the Bishop, Kora got on the computer and typed one up for me. It's things like this that separate Kora from Jake.

She sure does have nerve.

In case you can't see it:

"Mom I love because you are beautiful. I also love you because you are nice and sweet. I do not care if you are chubby I will allwase love you."

Love,

Kora

Little Jake

Last night after church, everyone had gone to bed.

The house was silent and I had finally gotten little August down.

I tiptoed away from his pak n play to the computer to shut it down, when I found this letter next to the keyboard and began to read it as my eyes filled with tears.

After I read it I snuck into his room, kissed him on the head and then tucked him under his Spiderman blanket.

I usually think of him as a mature 9 year old.

A wise old man in a kid's body.

He's my go to guy when I need someone I can trust.

Sometimes I'm really hard on him.

Okay,

most times I am.

BUT

I need to remember that as grownup as I think he is,

he's still just a little boy.

A little boy with a great big heart of gold.

I love you Jakob.

Kora is 7!

Today my lovely ONLY girl turned 7!

We started the morning with sprinkle donuts from Dad and a song that is seriously OUT OF TUNE. Hey we don't claim to be musical.

Kora is seriously enthused about the song and being woken up.

Pardon the nudity.

She had a lovely day at school celebrating in her class with friends.

Here are the heathens before we left.

Then this super Dad came home to surprise her after school with a special prize.

A dozen red roses for his Princess :)

Kora LOOOOOVES flowers.

Wait a minute. How did she get roses for her birthday and I got the Fall mix of Granny flowers? Something is seriously wrong with that.

Sweet Amber brought over delicious cupcakes for the dahling girl.

And she didn't waste a MINUTE partaking of them!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DEAR LOVE!

Ps...stop growing.

I'm off for an evening with friends to watch the New Moon Twilight Movie at MIDNIGHT!!

OOooOOooOOO Spooky, right?

Jake came home from school with helmet hair from his bike helmet and he said he looks like Edward. Then he proceeds to do THIS face (seen below) and says, "Are you afraid?" in his most Edward sexy voice.

Peace Out!

My New Campaign. And Junk.

So I have a new plan.

As most of you may already know, I'm a HUGE Ellen Degeneres fan. I think she might very well be one of the funniest people I know (not personally but...yea).

I watch her show religiously. Almost MORE than religiously cuz I tape EVERY SINGLE EPISODE and make sure to watch them but I missed church two Sundays ago and I didn't tape that.

Most of you may ALSO know about her campaign she started last January to be on the cover of O Magazine with Oprah. It only took her an ENTIRE year of persistent campaigning to finally get the cover. The December issue is her long awaited prize.

YaY for Ellen!!

Seeing Ellen reach her goal makes me feel a little ambitious.

I started thinking that maybe if I campaign for an entire year then I can have what I dream of too!

So here it is...

I WANNA BE ON THE ELLEN SHOW!!!!!!!!

Dear Ellen,

I think your show is fabulous. You make me laugh out loud every morning. My Penny guy and I can't resist dancing with you. We rock out in our PJ's with our bed hair and bad breath after the big kids leave for school. It makes us smile. Little August is also learning some dance moves and before long he'll be shakin his bootie right along side us.

I think you should invite me to be a guest on your show because it sounds super dreamy. I can be the spotlight mommy blogger who keeps it real (almost TOO real) with her white trash moments, weekly-wanna be's, lists of Junk and other crazy adventures. I'm pretty sure it'll be the most watched show on daytime television. I bet more people will watch the show than buy your Oprah cover magazine. Not to compete with you...I'm just sayin.

Don't worry. You have a year to give in to my request. So don't make any rushed decision just yet. Give it time. I know you'll fall in love with my offer.

Eeny-way (like Nacho says it),

I'll see you soon. Peace out.

Jessica

Sooooooo,

my day pretty much sucked.

First of all, I was told I absolutely, 100%, do NOT look like this girl.

OR

this girl.

And there wasn't any follow up like,
Her eyes are too squinchy or
Her cheeks are too round or
Your lips are thinner or
You're ten times hotter.
Nope.
It was more like,
Uhmm NO.
You're chubby,
have a FUPA,
wrinkles,
sickly white skin,
dark circles around your eyes,
saggy tube sock boobs with sand in the bottom of them,
mom butt,
fat knees,
you smell like spit up all day long,
you never bathe and if you do it's in recycled water,
and...
lots more.
In you're freakin dreams.

Soo, that kinda made me feel a little sad. I mean, it's not like I already feel incredibly self conscious about my looks right now. I mean, I AM a little busy with 900 kids to be able to take care of myself. I barely have time to wipe my butt and brush my teeth so that makes me feel really pretty. Plus my hair is super tangly and stripper-ish like ALL THE TIME. You'll see. I have a picture.
Whatever.
And then after that comment, things just seemed to fall apart the rest of the day.
Whiny grounded Miah who had to stay indoors ALL DAAY LOONG.
Groundings are defintely worse for the parents.

Puking crying babies that won't sleep for hours and HOURS and HOURS.

Trash strewn all over the house because my Penny likes digging in it.

Chocolate chips scattered in the entry to greet our guests.

A kajillion dirty bottles with a kajillion dirty parts that need TWO hands to be able to hand wash them all.

Clean laundry that just can't seem to get put away.

Snotty gooey noses that won't be wiped all day because there just isn't enough time, let alone hands to do it.

And like I said before,

Nasty stripper hair turned rat nest because there's no time to wash or brush it.

That really is my hair.

No for real, it is.

I can't wait for this day to be over.

And to make matters worse, I've been getting whiffs of butt ALL day and I couldn't figure out where it was coming from until just now.

Okay so this is random,

Do any of you notice that you're pierced ear holes smell like booty when you rub them? Apparently, when you have stripper hair that wraps around your earrings because it's a rats nest, it contracts the booty smell as well and then every time you turn around your booty hair sends a whiff of nasty to your nose.

I'm just sayin.

It makes a bad day even stinkier.

Here's to tomorrow.

Less boogers, booty smells and tangles.

PS. You wanna know how my statcounter tells me your name?

It doesn't.

A little birdie named Lindsay told me :)

Bet I made you nervous huh?

A Little of Everything

I've talked about my little Sassy Koko's personality before.

About her exquisite sense of style.

About her silly personality.

You all know how she is.

So when I saw her run out of the house to the park in THIS fabulous ensemble,

I HAD to take a picture.

It describes her perfectly.

The Hannah Montana shirt because she's super sassy and hip.

The hand me down basketball shorts because she's got a little tomboy in her and she can ALWAYS hang with the boys.

The fancy church dress high heels because she adores all things bling and loves being a girl.

And the super rad pose?

Well,

that's just extra!

Don't be jealous of my amazing HD point and shoot camera that makes you FEEL like you're actually standing on my front porch looking at this little hot mamma.

Go ahead and blow that picture up and see how clear and sharp it is.

Do it.

You know you want to.

OH

and one more thing...

So I KNOW there are people out there reading this bloggity schmog incognito.

But guess what?

I can still seeeee youuuuu.

That's right Caela and G-Unit in Sonoma, CA.

OH

And don't think I forgot about YOOOUUU Mrs. Smith.

Yea that's right.

So since I know about you then you can just go ahead and click that handy schmnady little "follow" button over there and be my pal.

*wink*

ONE Month Young August

My sweet little newest man child is officially ONE month today.

My favorite thing about him this month is how much he loves his biggest Bubba.

We discovered this secret just a week or two ago.

It never fails.

If the little man can't be consoled, we hand him over to Jake and he immediately gets cozy and quiet. Look at that sweet face. Believe it or not, that picture was taken just 10 minutes after he was having a screaming fit with ME.

Happy Birthday little Gus Gus.

I Love You.

VasectomITIS

WARNING: Summer do NOT read this blog because it DOES talk about noodles and NOT the penne kind...more of the spaghetti kind.

Well, it's almost time.

Time for the long awaited snippage of noodles.

My Lover went in for his vasectomy consultation today and made the appointment for...

DECEMBER 17TH

Dum Dum Dum...

I have waited for this day for some time now.

One of my uplifting pregnancy post it's put it best.

So why then am I feeling like this...

Yep!

That's right. I've got a bad case of vasectomitis.

Don't ask me why. I'm not even sure myself.

Is it because it's so final?

Is it because I'm scared it might not work?

Is it because there are millions and millions of people TRYING to have babies and here I am trying to STOP it? How selfish am I?

I guess part of me feels like we're too young to be making such a HUGE, literally LIFE ALTERING decision. Like someone should tell us we can't do that.

I know I'm all old now, but inside I still feel like me and My Lover are those same 18 and 16 year old kids in love making crazy decisions.

ISN'T ANYONE GONNA STOP US?!?!

Let's get the facts straight.

I do NOT want to EVER be pregnant again.

I do NOT think my sanity could handle any more kids, NOR my budget.

I do NOT EVER want to be on crappy birth control again.

(except for the 8 week period after snippage...don't worry people!)

And NO, I am NOT in a race to top the Duggars.

But something deeeep deeeeeep inside of me is making me feel all queasy and nauseous about taking matters into our own hands and stopping NATURE.

Should we be allowed to do this?

Whatever, it's going to happen. I just feel nervous about it.

In case you're not familiar with how it's done, here's the scoop.

Thanks to Michele R and the lovely video My Lover watched today, I found out that the surgery is pretty simple. So they make a tiny incision on each side of the sackage. Then, they take a crochet needle (not really, it's more of a real doctor tool but it looks like a crochet needle), probably the same one they used to break my water, and they pull out the "noodle" and snip snip on each side.

Doesn't that needle look so fancy and dramatic in all those feathers?

And then...

No more fish can swim up the noodle!

So the countdown begins.

I should find a ticker to put on my blog that counts down the days until Lover's surgery.

I wonder if they make those?

Wish us luck!

A Secret Agenda

Yesterday Kora cut her horse's hair. She said it was slanted and it needed to be straight.

Do you like it?

Isaak witnessed the event.

And then later that day he conjured up a secret plan.

He cuddled up close to his Gus and pretended to be loving on him. He knew I was watching.

But really,

he was looking for something he stashed under the couch for a moment like this.

And then he nonchalantly revealed his weapon of choice.

You see that? Serrated shears.


Come to find out Penny thinks that Gus' hair is "slanted" as well.
He planned on fixing that.

Thankfully Mommy was close by documenting the entire crime and saved the little Gus man from his first unintentional haircut.

But this guy still looks pretty sneaky.

Be on the lookout for more of his secret plans to be featured on future blog posts.

(Ignore the couch covered in sheets. It was leftover from Friday night movie night, we aren't just THAT white trash.)

Random:

I love my Jake.

He's so handsome and he rarely gets any blog time because he's always quietly doing his own thing. Well, I caught him. There he is :)

More Random:

Have you ever in your entire life seen a bigger head than this one? I mean seriously, that thing is freakin HUGE. Look at his forehead!! It's like the same size as the rest of his face. I thought MY forehead was bit. No, he's got me beat by like DOUBLE.

Good night Irene that sucker is big!!!!

But isn't he precious with it? He owns it.

So I journeyed to Barnes and Noble today with my Lover (who was on his 96).

It was nice to have a day date with him...

and three little boys who had to tag along.

Speaking of Barnes and Noble,

does yours have a deployment for kids section?

Mine does :)

I went there to get another sleeping baby book. I borrowed On Becoming Baby Wise from the library and read the entire thing in ONE day.

Yes people,

I READ.

I do know how.

I tried it out for a few days and it's killing me. I thought I was tough but this is like boot camp for babies and it makes a mutha's heart ache. Especially a mutha who wants to completely and TOTALLY spoil her last born.

Now I see why Lindsay is the way she is.

No, kidding.

But for real, she is.

(BTW, she has a super cute New Moon shirt she made for the Twilight premiere. If you want one you better click on her link...HURRY...GO NOW!!)

Anyway.

I decided to get the next step UP to sweetness but still with a little boot campy toughness.

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

I'm hoping to integrate the things I like from both books into my OWN sleeping plan.

The goal is to have THIS effect on Gus when 'I' want it.

Not just when he happens to do it.

Isn't he yummy?

Mmm...makes me wanna go eat a cosmic brownie or something.

No really, those are gross but I like the name.

More like a swiss roll or a ding dong.

MmMMmmmmMMmmmmM.

I better go.

Sometimes I shut my hall door (yes my hall has a door on it, it's genius) because I don't want the kids to wake the sleeping babies.

But sometimes, I use it for opposite effects.

And I PUT all the kids in the hall and THEN shut it.

So I don't have to hear THEM.

Right now they're all banging on it.

Gotta go feed the animals...

Weekly Wanna-Be

Holy Mother of let's take a break, right? Where have I been? I know you've missed my Wanna'Be's...I KNOW you have. Well, I'm still chubby but it's slowly melting away so I thought I'd venture back into my love for "admiring people's uniqueness" (that's the nice way of putting it).

This time is...

MRS. EDMONDSON!!

So I had to have a conference with the kids' teachers last week for this 9 week period and I got to meet the lovely Mrs. Edmondson. She's a sweetheart, really she is. SOO kind and Kora really does enjoy her BUT, she has the most interesting facial expressions and voice. I was in dream land listening to her talk to me about Kora. She sounds like she's having a really hard time getting the words out and like her toungue is all twisted up inside her mouth. Not to mention her neck which she keeps constantly flexed tight so you can see tendons protruding from it.

I LOVE meeting characters like her.

So unique and SO fascinating to watch speak. She makes my day :)

PS...Kora is the Q.U.E.E.N. at kissing butt and who better to butt kiss?

Her teachers. Yes.

She's managed to make all her teachers (from PreK to 1st, and all the church teachers as well) think they are THE MOST beautiful human on the face of the earth. She tells them over and over how much she loves them and how beautiful they are. She writes stories about them. She hugs them and holds their hand. She sits with them at recess sometimes.

Yea.

BIG TIME butt kisser.

So anyway...enjoy :)

http://

Three weeks I've lost forever...

I was feeling like I had nothing to blog about today. I kinda had an idea of what I THOUGHT I should blog about, but I thought it would be too boring for you guys...too sappy. But then I visited CJane's post and it confirmed that I definitely needed to blog my feelings. If not for anyone else, but myself.

This morning I pushed my two little boys around the neighborhood in my super rad Phil and Ted's stroller that my lovely friends got me for my birthday. I do every morning usually.

But this morning was different.

I felt really good. The weather was just right.

I strapped Penny guy in his front seat and handed him his leather football to hug.

He loves football.

Gus stayed asleep in his underground bassinet.

I listened to my ipod shuffle as I jogged softly up Stone St., looking out over the river, watching the Marines drive by in their cammies and seeing the fall leaves, covering the ground.

I guess there's just something about music that invokes a feeling...an emotion when you hear it and listen to the words. Either that or it's still my preggo hormones.

Whatever it was, I felt like crying.

There I was.

My prayers had been answered. I was no longer pregnant and now blessed with this beautiful baby boy...PERFECT in every way. I have my body back, all to myself like I wanted and it's now my turn to do with it what I will.

So why then, am I still sad?

I figured it out.

I looked down at my sweet Penny. A football in one hand, almost as big as himself, and his bottle in the other. His head was turned toward the river and he was perfectly content enjoying his drink, his ball and his view.

And then I looked down further at my sweet August. Wrapped in the hospital receiving blanket, silently sleeping as the stroller bounce rocked him to peaceful dreams of the pre-existence.

AMAZING.

Amazing how tiny and small he is. Amazing how just over a year ago that big headed Penny in the front seat was just as tiny as that.

MY Penny.

My Penny that can walk and talk and make me laugh. My Penny that crawls up into his high chair BY HIMSELF to eat his chicken or cereal or strawberries, BY HIMSELF.

My Penny that understands almost everything I say to him but sometimes pretends like he doesn't, just to be ornery.

HOW?

How did that happen? When did it happen?

When did my little Penny grow to be so big?

And then there's August who is so tiny and frail. Whose little toes seem to be just barely attached to that small foot with the tiniest bones. Who depends on me to feed him, to bathe him to hug him to hold him and kiss him. Who would die if I simply left him on the floor and walked away.

HOW?

How is it possible that he'll grow to be as big as Penny?

Or better yet.

Miah? Kora? Jake?

It's been just over three weeks since little Gus entered this earthly life.

Three weeks that I'll never get back.

Three weeks of gummy kisses and teeny tiny cries that I'll never hear JUST like that again.

Three weeks of smile filled dreams and 7 lb 4 oz squeezes that I'll never feel again.

Three weeks of 2 oz bottles that I'll never feed again.

It just doesn't seem fair, huh?

He'll keep growing.

And so will Penny.

And so will my three big kids, Miah, Koko and Jake.

And me?

I'll keep being sad and missing all their moments that I'll never get back except for in pictures and videos.

That,

and enjoying every last DROP of their sweet selves that I have NOW.

Wanna see my birthing slideshow?

Go HERE!

(But don't laugh at how fat I am. I know I was big but that hospital gown doesn't exactly flatter a person...YIKES!)

I told you!

Remember when I said, Penny makes loving fun?

Well here's proof.

So I walk outta my kitchen to see this view.

What the...

Is that what I think it is?

Yep.

Cold hot dog on the floor.

Penny's been here.

Uh oh...
Here's been more than just there.

Here too.
Regurgitated hot dog on the chair.

And I guess he got bored chewing it while watching Ellen too.

Remnants on the couch.

It wasn't long before I found the culprit...

blogging.

He acted innocent. But it was only me, Gus and him home this morning and Gus doesn't like the taste of hot dogs.

(Ya like Penny's shiner? He ran into the wall. Not the brightest crayon in the box but definitely the funniest.)

Even though he eats his cold hot dogs and leaves spit pieces strewn throughout the house I can't get mad. He looks too cute when he eats his cereal.

PS...Many of you have emailed me or sent em FB msg's asking about my necklace from the photos on Candace's Photography Blog (which by the way, if you click on her link once again you'll see even MORE precious pictures of my little Gus man...so GO!!).

Okay here's the scoop.

My Lover got me the necklace (I picked it out and told him to buy it for me for after I had the baby and then he forgot and then Amber pushed him to remember and then he finally did).

So anyway.

I got it from The Vintage Pearl (who also has a super cute blog!)

which I first found on NieNie's blog.

Go check it out, she makes some super cute stuff!
Thanks Erin!

Where oh Where has my Jessica gone?

A few of you have invited (or is it called challenged?) me to the blogging month dealio.

WELL

As much as I would love to commit, I cannot.

I'm not going to lie, days are hard around here.

Nights.

Harder.

I usually spend each day looking somewhat close to this...

No, that isn't Halloween makeup I have on. My eyes really ARE that dark due to lack of or ANY sleep at all. Any makeup you may see on my face when you blow this picture up (because let's face it, you know you're gonna blow it up to see and laugh at JUST how nasty and ugly I am...don't lie..."you ain't got to lie Craig!") is yesterday's makeup.

Whatever. That's reality and you know how I roll on my blog...

ALL reality.

ALL the time.

SO yesterday I FINALLY got out to go purchase my camera. I got a spiffy turquoise Canon Powershot. So far I love it. I went the Canon route this time because Coolpix has failed me twice thus far. But maybe it's because every time I get a camera I have one of these creatures grabbing for it to break it.

August is super dreamy still. I don't want him to grow up, but I do because I don't want to live like picture #1 forever. It's a catch 22 really. My last baby, I want to savor every BITE of him for eternity...

BUT

I wanna be done with this no sleep, miss my bed, crying Penny stage.

I thought about putting new post it's on my mirror to encourage me to get through these tough days that would read...

"Things won't be like this forever!"

"This time next year you'll be sleeping full nights."

"Only a few more weeks before you start working on your hot body for life."

But then I think reading them each day,

would make me sad all over again.
I don't wanna be sitting here next year, reading about how I wanted to rush through little Gus' life and then be missing him as a brand new lovie.

I GUESS Penny is doing better.

With the weather so nice I've been leaving the back door open for him to play on the screened porch and he loves it. It takes SOME of the whining away or at least mutes it (when I shut the door on him). No just kidding. But for real...I do. No. Kidding.

He's really the only thing right now that can seriously make me go into a hysterical laugh out loud laugh. (That and when My Lover does the mentally challenged wanna-be where he talks about the rainbow.)

I guess I can handle missing Gus being a tiny guy if he grows up and acts anything like my funny man Penny.

Penny makes loving fun.

Hmm...

Maybe that should be my bathroom post it note.

I smell like vomit. I gotta go.

Avent Bottles

Useful Information:

I bought about 16-20 of these bottles before I had Isaak and they've done us good over the past year. A little leaky around the nipple at times, but nothing TOO bad. I recently bought about 6 more before August arrived and they are the new honey colored BPA free Avent bottles. Ever since I started using them I've been cussing Avent's name because they leak,

ALLLLL THHHE TIIIME.

It's seriously annoying that I spend $5 for a SINGLE bottle that freakin LEAKS. I finally had enough today when I was trying to do a million other things while feeding Gus so I propped up his bottle with some blankies on the couch and walked away to get the kids out the door for school.

Only to come back to him about 3 minutes later (because he was making all these crazy gurgling noises) to find him literally DROWNING in formula because the stupid bottle was leaking AGAIN.

I decided enough is enough so I called Avent to complain. The lady on the phone was super short with me, kept cutting me off when I asked if they have been having LOTS of complaints about these bottles and then got my information to send me 4 replacement bottles. 4 is their max but once I get the 4, I can mail in all my others with their self addressed labels and get ALL of them replaced.

I'm thankful that Avent is paying attention to this problem and reconciling it BUT I'm annoyed that I spent over $100 in Avent products and I'm not entitled to a polite and courteous customer representative when I call to report a problem. I think that's the least of what I deserve, right?

If YOU'RE having problems with your Avent bottles, call this number to speak to an Avent customer service representative.

1-800-542-8368

or use THIS link to send an email.

I'm sure they'd LOVE to hear from you :)

Junk I wanna remember

1. Some of you have asked if I attempted the ever frustrating and stressful BOOBING again with this baby and my answer to you is...NO NO NO 100% NO ABSOLUTELY NOT. I didn't really question the fact except for like ONE day when I asked my Lover if I should at least pump my colostrum for the baby to have and he said...uhmmm...NO. Not that he isn't supportive of boobing, but he knows the stress that follows it...for ME at least. So when baby August arrived I had on my super tight sports bra which I lived in for the first two weeks. Engorgement was a killer, as usual, but I made it through changing boob pads like a mad woman so I wouldn't be caught walking around with wet circles on my shirt. One girl decided to call it quits after the first week but my left girl kept going strong up until about...oh wait, she still is going. Not bad, but for some reason she feels it necessary to continue supplying milk to a mouth that isn't needing it. She's slowing down, but because of her, I've been wearing one single boob pad to protect myself from her outbreaks. I guess Penny has been keeping close tabs on all my NEW habits since the baby arrived and the other day he found my makeup remover cotton pads, took one out, and slipped it in his shirt...like Mom. I was proud. He walked around all day with that thing in and even napped with it. Very observant, right? Although, wrong side.

2. The boobing issue leads me to my next subject...anti-depressants. Misty and a few others have been asking me how I am and I'm sorry for not answering, but I was planning on typing it all out here so I didn't wanna do it twice. So I started on Zoloft before I had the baby, had bad side effects and Doc told me to get off until after the baby.

In the hospital, he prescribed me Effexor XR which I started taking just a day or two after coming home.

AGAIN, same issues. No headaches but MAJOR MAJOR drowsiness. Like constant yawning and I could barely keep my eyeballs open on TOP of being already post preg tired. It was horrible. I felt like I was becoming MORE depressed because of how tired I was every day. I couldn't do a THING except sit on the couch and sleep.

I finally told myself to get OFF the pills and try it alone.

So I did.

And then, the heavens opened! I'm still tired a LOT of the time but it's normal post preg tiredness. I don't feel like a zombie walking around anymore, I feel like a tired Mom of a newborn which is as "normal" as I should feel right now anyway.

And depression?

Gone.

Personally, I have my own opinions about MY PPD. Others will probably disagree, but I'm speaking for ME and ME only. The two times I had bad PPD were with Jakob and Isaak. Ironically, the only times I tried the whole boobing crap were with...

Jakob and Isaak.

So to me, this says that boobing is the root of my depression. I THOUGHT I'd be depressed with this one, assuming that because I'd been depressed before...and bad too, but I forgot to take into account each individual situation which makes a HUGE difference. Plus I was SUPER depressed at the end of this pregnancy so it seemed to me that for sure I'd be depressed afterwards. Turns out not. For Moms who don't have issues with boobing, you probably don't suffer like us Moms that DO have issues so you will never understand. To ME, I now know what causes my PPD, it's boobing. For others, it may be something else. And I don't care what anyway else has to say about it really. As important as I think boobing is, it's NOT important enough to ME to put myself and my family in a bad situation.

So there's that. I'm drug free and I'm doing FIIIIINE :)

3. Penny just brought me a stick of opened Crisco and as I was cleaning it up, I realized he had been stuffing it in his ear. Lovely.

4. The name AUGUST LYN. Okay here's the story, although it's not all exciting and mystical like i think you guys are hoping it is. We didn't have a CLUE on a boy name...obviously, I mean we've used up HALF the baby boy names on our already boy laden family. We DID know that we loved Scout, we loved old names and we loved that all our kids have at least ONE family name (either first or middle). So we played around for a long time. Samuel? Samuel Scout? Nahhh...then one day I was sitting on the couch with my Lover and my phone. Ahhh, my lovely phone :)

So anyway, I decided to google "baby boy names from the 1800's" and up pops a big long list of about 50 names. I started to read them all off. My Lover listened to each name, staying silent. I didn't think he really cared or was even paying attention, UNTIL I said...

August.

"THAT'S IT!" he shouted! That's the name. August Lowe.

For some reason, it felt right and we both knew that would be his name! Now for the middle. We still loved Scout but it sounded wrong with August so that was out. Plus I really wanted him to have a family middle name since all the kids had a family name. We sat on it for a few days until I was in the car one day driving and it came to me that his middle name should be Lyn, like my middle name. I called My Lover and told him that his name would be August Lyn.

And that was that! It was chosen!

Dena was actually my sweet friend who told me about Gus being a nickname and I LOOOVED it right away! I wasn't big on Augie so Gus seemed perfect :)

5. It's been just over 2 weeks since little Gus was born and I've dropped 23 of my 45 pounds I gained during pregnancy. Most of it being water I'm sure because I'm still peeing allllll the time and throughout the night as well. It sucks. I was hoping that part would be over but I guess if pounds are still falling off, I'm okay with peeing.

I've been walking to the school and back to drop off and pick up Miah each day and I feel great when I do. No heaviness in the nether regions like I usually have. I can't wait to start running again. I tried my Taebo workout today thinking I was totally cool with doing and

WOW

It kicked my butt. Just the basic level AND I couldn't even finish it. I started feeling all faint and dizzy. So instead I ate two swiss rolls. Then I felt good again.

6. I still have NOTHING to wear but I'm not gonna complain because guess what...

I NEVER HAVE TO BE PREGNANT AGAIN!!!!

WOOO HOOOO!!!!

7. I'm buying a camera this week! I've been putting it off for a while because it hurts my brain to think of which one to get. I don't want it to crap out on me again like the last two. But enough is enough, I'm buying it NOW so good blog pictures are in the near future and maybe, just MAYBE...a wanna be. But of who? Ideas?

8. Okay gotta run. Blogger was acting up on me last night and only letting me visit private blogs. The NON privates were taking FOREVER to load for some reason so I'll give it another go round tonight. Look for me on urs!!